Caution!!! Subtle Tactics Narcissists Use to Manipulate You!
Narcissism is a phenomenon that has concerned people for a long time. As far back as Greek mythology we find Narcissus, a youth who falls in love with his own reflection and rejects the love of all others.
According to legend, one day at a clear spring he bent over the water to quench his thirst and caught sight of his reflection. He was very taken by the sight, but didn’t realize he was seeing himself and fell in love with the image. Obsessed with devotion, Narcissus pined away by the pool, eventually dying of thirst.
The story shows that Narcissus did not love himself, but only the image he had of himself. He was unable to make a connection between himself and his image, which eventually led to death. Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by an excessive need for attention, recognition, praise and admiration.
Often, narcissists have a lack of empathy and compassion toward others and are primarily concerned with exploiting people for personal gain. Typically, narcissists are preoccupied with trying to impress others. They lack interpersonal empathy as well as the ability to return emotional warmth to others.
However, it is important to distinguish between narcissism and a diagnosed narcissistic personality disorder, because the term narcissist is often used interchangeably to describe individuals who are extremely selfish, self-serving, and have no regard for the well-being of anyone other than themselves. These individuals are very ambitious, successful, and often found in leadership positions.
However, if narcissism is strongly pronounced and leads to suffering for the person concerned and his environment, it becomes pathological. This is called pathological narcissism. These people have considerable difficulties in adapting to their living environment and circumstances as well as an excessive urge to assert themselves.
People with a narcissistic personality disorder tend to emotionally abuse people in their immediate living environment in order to increase their own self-worth. They always demand that others look up to them; they must always be the center of attention. If the attention is no longer given, they look for a new person. They always consider themselves to be special.
Narcissists determine and set rules without communicating them in advance. Narcissistic personality disorder is rather rare in the general population. In patients undergoing psychiatric or psychotherapeutic treatment, the frequency of narcissistic personality disorder is put at one to 2%. Men are more likely to be affected than women.
Since a narcissist does not show any insight behavior, or because no abnormality is detected at all, the number of unreported cases is probably much higher than assumed. And indeed - narcissistic behaviors and traits occur much more frequently than one might think.
The problem is that you probably won't recognize a narcissist until it's too late, because they're experts at emotional manipulation and deception.
Today: 8 tactics a narcissist uses to manipulate you
In this article, we'll introduce you to eight subtle tactics a narcissist uses to tell you that you're being manipulated. Now let's get to the eight narcissist tactics:
1. Ridicule
Narcissists often use phrases like, "You're nothing without me," "You need me," "I'm the only one who will ever love you because you're such a terrible person,'' in arguments. He is so arrogant, never wrong in his opinion and believes he is entitled to everything. He brags and is willing to walk over dead bodies just to get what he wants.
They try to convince you to stay by their side by reducing your self-esteem tremendously and making you feel dependent. In a relationship with a narcissist, you will constantly face alternating criticism, compliments, and sarcastic remarks that will lower your self-esteem.
If this becomes too much for you and you bring it to the narcissist's attention, ask him to stop, he will say something like, "I was only joking," or he will try to explain to you that he is doing all this to help you, or even doing you a favor by telling the truth.
2. Defamation
While narcissists go out of their way to make you stop believing in yourself, they also try to make others stop believing in you through defamation. They try to ruin your image and talk bad about you, they share your secrets or even make up stories just to make you appear in a bad light. The reason narcissists do all this is to isolate you from others. In this way, the narcissist hopes to have you all to themselves.
3. Lack of appreciation
Narcissists firmly believe that they are the most perfect person in the world, and everyone else is inferior to them. Therefore, it's no surprise that they have a tendency to make your environment feel bad. To make you see this and influence you, they find various reasons.
Phrases like, "Why do you even care?", "They've always been horrible to you anyway", or "They're not even worth it" come up. Narcissists dehumanize victims by diminishing their worth and convincing everyone else that their actions are actually fair.
4. Scapegoating
Another very popular type of manipulation is to portray someone as a scapegoat. This even happens for the sheer pleasure of it. They accuse another person of messing everything up in order to make themselves appear blameless. This makes them feel powerful and important.
5. Emotional appeals
You can be sure that a narcissist will take advantage of you in any way possible. Often, narcissists play on your emotions and use their close relationship with you to force you to do them a favor or give them what they want. The only thing that matters is how they feel.
They will trample over your emotions to make themselves feel worthy. They may do this in a very subtle way. For example, they might try to remind you of all the good times you shared, making it seem like you are a bad friend or partner or family member because you are rejecting his wishes in the present moment. Emotions with narcissists are guided only by his wants and needs.
6. Skepticism
Another common tactic a narcissist uses to manipulate you is to feign ignorance and present themselves as innocent. They pretend to be ignorant and can't explain what they are supposed to have done wrong.
They then pretend that they have no idea what they did, that it was never their intention to hurt anyone, and therefore they should not be held accountable for their actions. A particularly devious narcissist might even manage to convince you that you are the one responsible and to blame for what happened here.
7. Exaggerate
Narcissists have a tendency to exaggerate excessively in order to appear better to others than they actually are. A narcissist wants you to conform to his wants and needs. He does this by constantly highlighting and emphasizing all that he has ever done for you, making you believe that he is always right and should never be questioned.
Your statements are often questioned in an argument to demonstrate that your way of thinking is flawed and illogical. This is where sentences like "You're wrong" come up in conversation. These phrases are then followed by a series of arguments or comparisons to make them seem more positive and believable. He makes himself the star of the show.
8. Quid Pro Quo
While many are certainly fooled by a narcissist's apparent selflessness, narcissists don't really care about doing things for their fellow man or even helping. The only thing that matters to them is admiration, backed up with favors and good will. Be careful when asking a narcissist for help, you may have to pay him back tenfold. He will not let up and will continue to take advantage of you. To date, it is not really clear how people actually become narcissists.
What is clear is that it is a personality disorder that can be diagnosed as early as puberty and adolescence. In many families, it could be observed that one parent either overly spoiled the child or was significantly critical. Others came from broken homes, where they were left to their own devices and thus completely overwhelmed. Lack of love was replaced by an overemphasis on their own worth. We hope you enjoyed today's post. That's it for today.