7 Secret Signs That Someone Is a Narcissist

They often react in a very domineering and condescending manner and are only too happy to push themselves into the center of attention. They exaggerate excessively and do not overly concern themselves with honesty when they tell tall tales of their accomplishments. But then there is also the kind of person who is often perceived as rather reserved, shy, and insecure.

Such a person has always remained quiet and does not appear to seek attention at any price, and seems quite sensitive and quiet. Which of these two people seems narcissistic to you? Probably you, as well as the majority of people, would declare the self-confident and arrogant person to be a narcissist. What if we now tell you that you are completely wrong.

All narcissists are not of the same type, there is the so-called open narcissist. This is how most of his fellow men would classify him. Egocentric, arrogant, domineering and much more which serves his exalted self-conception. But there is also the covert narcissist, who has the characteristics of the second stereotype just described. Demonstrating shyness, apparent reticence, and insecurity. In this article we’ll show you the 7 typical behaviors by which you can recognize a narcissist.

1. He Believes That No One Can Understand Him

Narcissists often believe that they are special—better than others. Always superior to other people. All the people around them are inferior in their eyes and not capable of understanding their problems. Narcissists almost always overestimate themselves. Therefore, their fellow human beings are never smart enough to meet them face-to-face. And narcissists complain about this non-stop.

At the beginning it may not be so clear that you are dealing with a narcissist, and you may want to show pity and understanding for his apparent world-weariness. Quickly it will become clear to you that you yourself are one of the people who cannot understand the narcissist because of your inferiority. At this point you break off contact with such a person—and as soon as possible.

2. They Engage in "Fishing for Compliments" Conspicuously Often

Narcissists need their fellow humans to look up to them and express admiration. In pursuit of this they often use false modesty in order to obtain compliments. Do you know people who conspicuously often hide their light under a bushel, criticize themselves excessively often, especially in the presence of groups of people, and excessively downplay their own importance, job, or studies.

Bingo, then perhaps you know such people who again and again engage in this exaggerated self-flagellation and so-called suffering, by which they then evoke compliments from others which extol their great abilities in angelic tones. And that is where the crucial point lies. That is all the narcissist wants to achieve. Exactly this approach of the narcissist is also colloquially called "fishing for compliments."

After one compliment is made, the narcissist often interprets the silence of others, who have seen through these scams, as approval of their uselessness. Then the narcissist will demand comments from those who remain silent. Don't be fooled. True friends would never ask this of you.

3. They Express Compassion or Empathy Only Out of Self-Interest

An example: someone has just broken up with a long-time partner and wants to pour his or her heart out to the supposed friend. Narcissists do not respond here with empathy and compassion. Instead, they take such a conversation as an opportunity to also cry and overshadow those around them with their own problems. Don’t expect honest advice or comfort from narcissists.

They are simply not interested in their fellow human beings on an emotional level. Often narcissists show sympathy and comfort when other people are around. But narcissists are concerned only with themselves and their image. They want others to always have a good impression of them and see their feigned good nature. Next time, share your pains with real friends.

4. They Can't Handle Criticism

Any comment that is not adulatory is taken by a narcissist as a stab to the heart. Narcissists are often classified as incapable of conflict; however, that would be just too understated. One must not forget one thing. Narcissists always tend to overestimate themselves. They always think they are the smarter, more successful and better person.

The tiniest criticism has therefore enormous effects on these oversized egos. Especially covert narcissists, who try to hide their emotions internally, can react very quickly in an oversensitive and exaggerated way. More than anything, they want the recognition and admiration of their fellow men.

If they do not get it, or if someone slightly criticizes them, they become incredibly angry and react irrationally. In these cases too, it is best to remain neutral and calm and not add fuel to the fire.

5. He Or She Is Always Envious and Begrudging of Others

People who are at peace with themselves and their lives are always in a position to grant their fellow human beings an equally fulfilling and happy life. Envy is rarely found here. Narcissists, on the other hand, strive for perfection and must always have the feeling that they have more, and are more, than others.

Just the slightest sign that someone, for example, is more successful at work, or has a bigger house, triggers excessive envy and resentment in narcissists. They then tend to put the other person down in order to prop themselves up and maintain their inner feeling of superiority. So, as you should not be put down, you should celebrate your successes by yourself or with real friends.

6. They Are Strikingly Quick to Anger

As already discussed narcissists always need to feel admired, to fell a sense of personal superiority. If they bump into people who confuse them, or do not tell them every day how wonderful, unique, and successful they are, narcissists become irritated. Then they quickly become angry because they feel that someone is not giving them their proper appreciation and recognition of their successes.

This is often accompanied by a desire for revenge, and a plan to get back at the person who failed to admire them. Here, too, one should simply get out of the way of the narcissist. It's his misbehavior, not yours.

7. They Are Always Passive Aggressive

Narcissists will do anything to get what they want. A narcissist doesn't understand the word, “no,” and should anyone in their environment dare to refuse tribute in any way, the heavy artillery will be brought out. Up front, a narcissist will always give you the feeling that everything is fine. Or even ignore you. But underneath they are plotting and scheming against you.

They feel betrayed and offended. Not infrequently, they then manipulate others to join in badmouthing you behind your back. All to make you seem to be the bad person who rejected the poor narcissist. Don't let it come to that and keep plenty of distance between yourself and the narcissist in the future.

Today’s Conclusion:

Just because one of the characteristics might apply to a boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't mean they are narcissists. However, if a person comes to mind whose behavior lines up with several or even all of the listed characteristics, such person is most likely a narcissist. Do yourself a favor and distance yourself from this person as soon as possible. Narcissists can be very manipulative. Once they have you in their clutches, it will only be that much harder to get away from them. That's it for today.