THIS Is NOT True Love!

In every relationship there are things that you simply come to accept. If the tolerance limit is exceeded, that’s when quarrels can happen. But where is your personal threshold? How much can your partner allow himself, does he appreciate and love you at all or is it time to pull the emergency brake? These are the questions we want to explore in this article and present the nine signs that will help you distinguish fake love from true love. 

1. Possessive behavior

If your partner is getting suspiciously clingy and hardly grants you any personal freedom, this behavior should make you suspicious, because a very possessive partner does not mean well. Superficially, he will want to give plausible reasons why he restricts you so much, for example, by telling you that he just doesn't want to have to share you with others and he professes his great love. The motives of such a partner are clear: He wants to exercise control, spy on you or even manipulate you. An intact relationship requires mutual attention, as soon as a partner confuses a healthy closeness with pushy intrusiveness and wants to see you by his side at all times, you should think about a clarifying conversation with him or, if even that does not help consider separation, for possessive behavior is something you shouldn’t stand for.

2. Playing with your feelings

Feelings are nice as long as they are genuine and sincere, but it is different when a partner plays with you and your feelings. In this case, he may want to test how far he can go. For example, if he starts talking about his ex at every opportunity, you’re not going to like it and you will ask him to stop hurting your feelings. Maybe he gets something out of such provocations or even wants to make you jealous in order to put himself in the foreground and get your full attention. This behavior is a very unattractive attempt to fulfill a purpose with your emotions: Don’t play this game. Instead, put him in his place.

3. He is not laughing with you, but at you

Laughter is healthy and enlivens togetherness, a good relationship is characterized by a healthy portion of humor, and there should be a mutual understanding for each other without having to mince words. For example, if you suffer from a tormenting phobia, then understanding is appropriate and gloating of any kind is not a good way to talk about your fears. If your partner does not take your concerns seriously or even smiles in response, it shows bad character. Being ridiculed on sensitive topics hurts. If it’s a matter of a close confidant, clear words up to and including the breaking off of the relationship are essential.

4. The futile search for happiness

If you just can't go to sleep at night or have to cry to friends about your partner, something is fundamentally wrong in the relationship. There can be many reasons for this. What exactly makes you unhappy or to what extent your boyfriend contributes to your frustrating life situation, only you can find the answer to that, deep inside. If, on top of that, he is doing anything but trying to make you happy, then the relationship is doomed to fail. In this case, the single life is more desirable than a partnership that is only one on paper. Listening to your intuitive feelings about whether such a relationship still has a chance and a frank conversation in private are advisable.

5. Lies and nothing but lies

A healthy relationship is based on mutual respect and honesty. When your partner lies to you, it tests your relationship's durability. Moreover, you lose trust in him, which results in serious interpersonal disturbances. In particular, it's not about more or less harmless white lies, which include, for example, that a partner fibs a little bit about his weight in order to protect his pride, but serious taboo violations. A last resort for the relationship can only be to lay all your cards on the table. In case of further breaches of trust, you'd better turn your partner down.

6. No common goals

 An exemplary relationship thrives on shared plans. The next trip or, more importantly, family planning should be a mutual affair. As soon as one partner goes it alone or involves you less and less in his plans, conflicts are inevitable. If your boyfriend or her husband behaves in this way, then he proves that he does not care much about your future together, and in the event of real problems arising, he will want to get out of the affair in a similarly uncooperative and selfish way. Especially in difficult phases of a relationship, values such as solidarity and loyalty are important. If a partner contributes more to chaos than to problem solving because of his uncontrolled solo detours, the road to a common future can be a rocky one.

7. Unreliability

In a relationship, there is hardly anything worse than a partner whose reliability leaves much to be desired. Especially in bad phases, you want a partner who stands firmly by your side, providing support and strength. However, if he or she always puts forward flimsy reasons, for example private or professional appointments that were not absolutely necessary, just to shirk responsibility, proceed with caution with them. A good partner senses when he or she needs to be there for the other person. If this awareness is completely missing, sooner or later major relationship problems will arise, because no partnership is immune to crises. A loving partner will not turn away from you in such moments. It is precisely in these phases that the wheat is separated from the chaff. Those who don’t love you in every situation of life, prove to be false friends.

8. He’s still in a relationship

Real love knows no alternative. So if a boyfriend is quote-unquote double-dating, for example because he's still married, it's a clear sign that you're not his absolute priority, which you understandably want to be and indeed should be in a good relationship. You'd better not put much stock in the excuse that he'll settle the matter shortly, because a loving partner wants things to be clear from the get-go and can swear fidelity to you. You should then ask yourself whether you want to put up with this uncertainty.

9. Constant transfers

A partner who loves you wants to spend every free minute with you. If spending time together on the weekend is the exception not the rule, because of a pub crawl with his friends or a football game, for instance, you can see your partner’s clear priorities. And this obviously doesn't include you. Apartness that occurs with conspicuous frequency should make you wonder.

Today’s Conclusion: Even in the best relationships, there will be disputes

However, if breaches of fidelity or loyalty occur, these factors often weigh heavily on a relationship. Such serious incidents should not be forgiven out of good nature or fear of being alone. That's it for today.