Uncomfortable Truths About Men That You Don’t Want to Hear!
Most women think that they need to kiss a lot of frogs in their life to make their prince magically appear. But is that really true? Are there really endless amounts of men out there that simply aren't marriage material? Sure, Hollywood has certainly contributed a lot to the fact that dreams and reality are so far flung from each other. But isn't it high time that we challenged these illusions a bit? Here, we want to get the ball rolling and explain 25 uncomfortable truths about men.
1. Men do have hearts
Yep, it’s true. And we don’t just mean the muscle that pumps blood through their veins. They also love and they also suffer when their hearts are broken. A man’s emotional world might still be a mystery for us women, but it definitely exists and not just in the movies.
2. Love or suffering?
Unfortunately, we have to contend with both of these options when it comes to hopeful new relationships. It will either become a strong partnership for years to come, or it’ll all end in tears.
3. Trust is also the hardest part for men, too
It takes a long time to build it, and only seconds to break it. Trust is the foundation for every relationship for a reason.
4. Even the biggest love can have a sell by date
Relationships only last forever and ever in romance novels and films. In real life, life always gets in the way. Just because couples stay together doesn’t mean that they’re doing so out of choice.
5. Nobody is exempt from heartbreak
Every woman at least once in her life will meet a guy who’s going to break her heart. We have to learn this lesson, not let it break us.
6. A man would never say “All I want from you is sex”
Of course, he might keep his options open, even if he knows exactly what it is that he wants. Don’t automatically assume that he’s looking for true love just because he’s not being blatantly obvious.
7. Even nice guys can be idiots sometimes
You never really know where it’s going at the beginning of a new relationship. Don’t let good manners or a friendly attitude distract you from the fact that you don’t know this person very well yet. When it comes to dating, nobody shows their true self straight away.
8. Believe him when he tells you who he is
Rose tinted glasses can be the final nail in the coffin for any objective assessment of a new man. We only see the good, ignoring any warning signs. If a man says, for example, that he’s not looking for commitment, or that he wants an open relationship, then you should believe him. Our blind spots will only lead to a rude awakening later on down the line.
9. The ex-files should stay closed for good
There’s a reason that we split up with our ex. Keeping on-off relationships alive artificially like a coma patient only prolongs the suffering of everyone involved.
10. Just because he says it like it is doesn’t automatically make him the bad guy
Men are often just more direct than women. They don’t sugar coat it; they get to the point when discussing problems or differences and this quickly paints them as a villain. Keep it fair, that’s the motto.
11. No man is worth sacrificing yourself for
It doesn’t matter if it’s a career dream or your heart’s personal desires, if a partner forces you to sacrifice your dreams, whether they realize it or not, then they’re not the right person for you.
12. Appearance is important
Even though looks aren’t everything, you do need to find the man sitting across from you attractive in every way at the beginning of a relationship. He’ll bring the musty old sweatpants out of the closet soon enough.
13. Looking good on paper doesn’t mean anything
Theoretically perfect for each other? Congrats! Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean much when it comes to real life chemistry. What use is a shared love of Thai curry if you can’t stand each other?
14. Online dating sites and apps are a man’s dream
If you want to go in search of Mr. Right online, then you need to keep 3 things in mind. Firstly, a lot of the men on there are already in a relationship, and are, at best, hoping for a bit on the side. Secondly, some of the most promising profiles are actually fake, and they’re managed by employees of the site. Finally, everyone lies on their profile to look better.
15. Writing is silver, talking is gold
Day after day of countless emails or texts exchanged is not going to bring you closer together. True love is old-fashioned. It still happens out there in real, analogue life.
16. People change, and relationships change, but not always for the better
Keep it absolutely clear that even the most beautiful love and the most wonderful partner by your side can be subject to change over time.
17. Radio silence all day speaks volumes
No words are sometimes the most meaningful ones when we admit this is the truth. If he doesn’t contact you all day, then you’re not his priority.
18. Saying, “I miss you,” doesn’t mean anything
Fancy talk that’s all just for show. He might as well be reading you a nonsense poem. If his fine words are not backed up by actions, then they’re not really sincere.
19. He can break your heart without even being in a relationship with you
Be careful with your feelings. Us women are sometimes too generous with them and end up with a broken heart. Unrealistic hopes often lead us down that path.
20. “I’m not ready for a relationship” is the mother of all lies
This sentence, roughly translated, means “I’m not interested in you.”
21. When men say an affair, they mean an affair
Don’t let yourself get involved in an affair, or a friends with benefits relationship if you’re genuinely looking for a real partnership with a future. It’s just time wasted.
22. The beginning can tell you everything about the ending
If a guy doesn't really care about you in the beginning, this passive attitude won't get better with time, in fact it will get worse. You can try to force a relationship, of course, but you won't be happy with it.
23. Sex won’t turn into feelings
For men, a night of passion is often just that. If he’s interested in you, he’ll carry on being interested. If there was none there to begin with, it’s not going to magically appear.
24. A friendly gesture doesn’t automatically mean he’s interested in you
If a man holds the door for you, or buys you a coffee, that’s very nice and friendly of him. It is not a marriage proposal, and it certainly doesn’t tell you anything about his feelings for you.
25. Mixed signals are a very obvious, “Maybe”.
If he’s not standing at your door armed with a bunch of red roses articulately explaining his intentions, then his feelings are clear, you’re not his number one dream gal.
Today’s conclusion: Of frogs and princes
Men are how they are. Most of them are quite happy that way. The problem is actually our biased perception and the incredibly high expectations we have of the opposite sex. It’s never been easier to meet men as it is today. And it’s never been harder to settle down. The agony of choice affects both sides in equal measure.