Careful! THESE Habits Will Ruin Any Relationship!
See this as your guide to avoiding self-sabotage. Relationships are a precious commodity. The increasing number of single households clearly shows that more and more people are not up to this challenge or they simply do not want to face it anymore. The reasons for this are numerous: some relationships should indeed be ended sooner rather than later, while still others may be ended too lightly, in the heat of the moment. Injured pride, for example, is a frequent and loud but poor advisor in relationship matters. No human being is perfect. Accordingly, no partnership can be either. However, there are 13 sure-fire ways to cut off the air to your relationship. These are briefly presented in this article.
1. Wordlessly accepting everything even though it bothers you.
There's a world of difference between compromising and always putting your own needs last. If your partner walks into the bathroom with dirty shoes every day and you're seething with anger inside, it does no good to swallow it over and over again. Eventually, you'll blow your top and the magnitude of this reaction could be epic. Besides, how is she or he supposed to know that you find certain behaviors annoying if you don't address them? This and similar points should be clarified at the beginning of a new love. Otherwise, as always, silence counts as consent and habits become problematic.
2. Lack of communication.
Relationships can be maintained for an astonishingly long time without the two protagonists really talking to each other. These silent partnerships are more like roommate situations, where sharing the rent and operating costs is the main focus. Logically, those who no longer speak to each other quickly lose touch.
3. Taking everything for granted.
You've made yourself really comfortable in your new relationship and everything is going smoothly. That's all well and good, but it shouldn't encourage a wandering eye. Nor are calm waters a free pass to let yourself go, stop caring about your partner, or take it all for granted. Good relationships are like nuggets of gold among stone: a find of real rarity and value.
4. Avoiding any confrontation.
Even if it is not always nice, it is essential to defend one's own ideas in the context of a partnership. If you never take a stand and always give in for the sake of peace and harmony, you will eventually end up empty-handed.
5. Unrealistic expectations.
A partnership is not a savior that does everything well for us and cushions our own shortcomings. Relationships are not self-sustaining, do not guarantee prosperity, and are not a self-service store for those who can't get anything done on their own. Many things get better with a partner, but no relationship is a panacea for all your issues.
6. Displaying passive-aggressive behavior.
The cold shoulder is actually the iceberg that can sink a relationship. Pointed comments, days of contemptuous silence, and constantly dishing out cryptic remarks are nails in the coffin for any relationship. This tactic is vastly more damaging than any outright argument, since at least in the case of a verbal disagreement real communication has taken place in the end.
7. Addictive behavior.
Addictive behavior rarely allows for a relationship. It is too difficult to get through to the person affected or to watch helplessly as they destroy themselves. In addition, an addiction is almost always accompanied by a threat to one's own existence. Maintaining an addiction usually costs a lot of money. Those affected then develop a wide variety of strategies to obtain it, which often leads directly into the downward spiral of crime.
8. Being unfair.
Even in war, there are rules and laws that should ideally be followed. Those who fight with hard and unfair verbal blows in relationships tangibly injure their partner. To accuse them of wrongdoing because of unavoidable personal circumstances, to condemn them for their family or origins, and so on, is not adult behavior on equal footing.
9. Not addressing your better half on equal footing.
Entering into a relationship with someone you don't really trust in the first place is a recipe for terror without end. Anyone who already knows that he or she is demanding should not also enter into a partnership that doesn’t meet those demands. Age difference, different educational standards or social backgrounds must either honestly not matter or they will always be the pebbles in the shoe of this unequal pairing.
10. Not respecting boundaries.
Sharing everything in a partnership doesn't always have to be taken literally. Here, too, one has a right to privacy, and here, too, there are boundaries that must not be crossed. If you constantly fear attacks on your sense of shame or your property, you will quickly lose trust and end the relationship.
11. Asking for help and not accepting it.
This exercise is especially difficult for long-term singles. It is important to ask your partner for help from time to time, because everyone likes to feel needed. A fatal mistake here would be to ask for support, but then tackle the project alone. In this way, we signal that we don’t have faith in our better half to do a good job. Not all people can keep up with our pace, but we should still give them the opportunity to do so.
12. Keeping your partner at a distance.
If you bring your own personal armor into a new relationship, you won't give it a real chance. The give-and-take between closeness and distance in a partnership is always difficult, because there are hardly ever two identical ideas about the right balance. If you never open up and really let the other person share in your world, you will quickly find yourself single again.
13. Being hypercritical.
It can't be stressed enough: No one, really no one, is perfect. Nor are we ourselves, even if we like to cherish a blind spot in this context. Anyone who demands the superhuman from their partner should enter into a relationship with the incredible Hulk or some other idealized novel character. Constant nagging and criticizing, on the other hand, is the steady drip that slowly and agonizingly erodes any relationship until nothing remains. Moreover, partners of notorious naggers tend to switch off sooner rather than later anyway. Nagging is a survival mechanism that consigns the desired effect of the constant criticism to failure.
Today’s Conclusion:
100% relationship, 50% responsibility. Relationship work is a give and take. Compensating for a burden that you’re not willing to bear will not work in the long run. Likewise, holding on to a love that the other has already said goodbye to internally will not work. Two people are needed to keep a relationship alive. One person alone can at best create a stable vegetative state. You can actively shape a relationship every day. Your biggest enemy, besides cheating and abusive behavior, is passivity. If you no longer show any initiative, it is better to go through life as a single person again. After all, shrinking your radius of action to your own self makes things much more manageable. That's it for today.