Will I Ever Find Love Again?
Life rarely runs in a straight line or without significant interruptions. No one knows in their mid-20s exactly where they will be in their 40s, 50s or 80s. Perhaps you know the saying: If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. That's exactly how it goes in life sometimes, and we're not always thrilled with the results. Especially in the matter of love, unfortunately, or thankfully: Nothing is impossible. Hardly any couple stays together for life anymore. Separation and divorce rates are higher than ever, and a kind of new non-commitment has replaced marriage vow. Between the ages of 40 and 50, most relationships frequently come to an end. The children are out of the house and the desire to rediscover life and oneself is great. But how does it actually work to send love, lust and passion back to the starting line at 50? We have a few ideas in this article.
1. Your standing in life has never been better
Think about how your younger self, from an objective point of view, would have been judged in the ruthless dating sector. When we are young, unfortunately, we are often just that and nothing more. Now in our prime, we can look to more than just financial and social reputations. We have also developed significantly as people. We have matured from a person to a personality, we no longer put up with nonsense and we have very precise ideas about what our lives should look like. Ideally, we stand by the motto: better alone than in bad company. Once you have come to this conclusion, you are a jackpot for any potential partner. Why? There is nothing that kills a new love faster than being needed. Desperation and neediness kill any spark of romance in an instant. On the other hand, if you have confidence, strength of character, and a solid plus on the life balance sheet, you'll be more attractive than you've ever been in your life. And attractiveness is what dating is all about at any age, it's just that the definition of it shifts a bit in different directions over the years.
2. Many issues are obsolete
If we can overlook the fact that at 50 we may no longer be the perky and relentlessly life-hungry teenagers of yesteryear, we come to the following liberating realization: dating beyond middle age has only advantages that we were not allowed to enjoy in our younger years. One big question falls out of the running, namely that of starting a family. At this age, the biggest question is how much one still wants to support one's own children or grandchildren, but nothing more. Residence, profession, education and the search for self-determination and self-realization are also generally in the clear. At around 50, we actually have the unprecedented freedom to concentrate solely on our heart when looking for a partner. All the formal background noise that would have dominated a relationship in the past are eliminated. And last but not least, parents probably will no longer have any say in the matter of a new love.
3. Anything is possible, who should stop us?
Patchwork family, romantic relationship with a future, hot affair, vacation acquaintance or friends for the rest of your lives together. If you're looking for a partner again at 50, all options are open to you. The dating market may have changed, but the choice has never been greater in life. Women and men alike may consider to their heart's content whom they would like to have at their side from now on. Here, the heart may decide, but of course also passion, which at this age is far from being history. Anyone who only wants to establish a community of interest, and no longer a life partnership, clearly shows this.
4. High standards, friend or foe?
Knowing what you want, or at least what you definitely don't want anymore, is a clear head start in life. When it comes to love, this sense of entitlement can prove to be a hindrance, at least that's what we've been led to believe. Think about it logically; you don't actually need a partner anymore when you're 50. Those who can be alone well, are best equipped for a relationship with a future, because there will be no pressure or coercion weighing it down. So don't let anyone tell you to lower your expectations just so you won't be alone in your old age. The mistake of bending ourselves for the illusion of love is one we have probably all made before. Don't repeat it, rather stand by your wants and desires.
5. Time works with you, not against you
Even though you might think that half of our lives are over by the time we're in our 50s, it's the other way around in terms of quality. All those years in which we desperately tried to reconcile starting a family, a career, self-discovery and the life of a partnership can now give way to the phase of individualization. Take your foot off the gas and think about what you want to do with this time you have left. You'll see, quality adds more life to your years, even if life is already starting to wane in years. It doesn't matter if we turn 65 or 95, if we have been able to savor and enjoy every breath of our existence to the fullest. But the search for a partner around the age of 50 also brings with it a very practical aspect of time. Many couples are divorced during this time, and the number of potential new fish in the pond increases with each separation, as cynical as that may sound.
Today's Conclusion: Time will tell, new love will come
At 50, we no longer have any obligation when it comes to love, but we are allowed to do everything, and definitely should. The freedom that comes with increasing years of life is practically infinite and certainly priceless. You deserve the very best for your second half of life, because this is, in fact, what you bring to a relationship. After all, one of the many benefits of getting older is we thankfully know who we are, and we are looking for like-minded people. That's it for today.