10 Painful Truths About Life That You Need to Experience Yourself

Insight for realists. The truth hurts, unfortunately, that is its nature. Life is not stingy with hard lessons either, but the bottom line is, these lessons move us forward. Why we humans always have to learn the most important insights the hard way will probably remain a secret forever. This learning process does not work according to any particular pattern, either. We cannot book a crash course in aha experiences in our early 20s so that the nasty surprises are quickly overcome. We learn step by step and at exactly the pace that fate has planned for us. The good news in this context is that every experience brings us closer to a truth. In this article we would like to present to you ten of these important insights for a better life.

1. If you harm others, you harm yourself.

Our lives are not made easier by making the lives of others more difficult. Unfortunately, this realization has not yet reached all of our envious and begrudging contemporaries. Many people draw their life energy by draining or spoiling others’ experiences as much as possible. Toxic personalities, however, are actually unfortunate creatures, because with every thorn they drive into the flesh of their fellow human beings, they hurt themselves. They can't help it. Everything we send out comes back to us, so goes the law of attraction. Besides, most people recognize the difference between right and wrong, good and evil. Therefore, every insult and every intrigue we inflict on others are stabs at our own heart.

2. If you want to win, you must fail.

The aphorism, "You have to break eggs to make a cake," is as sad as it is true. There is nothing new to discover on a well-trodden and comfortable path. How are we supposed to learn and grow beyond ourselves if we always succeed and find everything child's play? The greatest discoverers and inventors in human history were successful mainly because they never gave up...and some would have had every reason to do so. Failure is the most important teacher in our lives. Only by trying and failing, step by step, do we move forward. It is tedious and it has certainly destroyed many careers of people with less thick skin and less stamina.

3. The easy way does not make you happy.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe knew it when he wrote, "Nothing is harder to bear than a series of beautiful days." The ease of sweet idleness, a road without obstacles, and a never-ending streak of happiness are deadly to our spirit of discovery in the long run. Although it sounds like a contradiction in terms, we need obstacles to move forward.

4. The only constant in life is change.

The ancient Greeks recognized this truth early on. Nothing in life is permanent. In the good times, this realization certainly falls under "dumb luck," but in the darkest hours of our lives, it is often the only comfort and ray of hope. Those who face this truth will appreciate every moment more from now on. It will never come again and may have been the last happy one for a long time.

5. What you fear, you should do.

As long as it's not running naked into a pack of hyenas or cliff diving in Acapulco, taking a risk can be incredibly liberating for us; but only afterwards. Those who can conquer their fears of their own free will feel invincible afterwards. I'm sure there are countless little things you still have on your "I dare not" list. The important thing is to take the first step. Donating plasma, approaching the handsome stranger on the subway and having dinner all alone in a gourmet restaurant, all these will challenge us but never overwhelm us. We can actually only win because we have triumphed over our fear.

6. Distrust the distrustful.

Just as a liar does not believe anything another liar says, we should not necessarily place our trust in all those who have not mastered the art of trust themselves. Chronically distrustful people have a good reason for being the way they are. Sometimes they also take the shortcut and out themselves by proving to us that they do not deserve our trust at all. This popular mind game takes place mostly in relationships entered under the bad omens of betrayal or cheating. Sooner or later, we learn that we have always been right with our doubts; sad but unfortunate reality.

7. Those who can't do it themselves try to teach it to others.

This phenomenon is interesting and annoying at the same time. Those who constantly impose good advice and tips on others that were not asked for have their own skeletons in the closet right there. It’s no coincidence that short lectures on the subject of wellness and health are often given by people who need to learn one or the other thing about it themselves. And most relationship tips, as we all know, come from the divorced and permanently single.

8. You can't force admiration.

Praise or compliments that have to be demanded are worth nothing. Fishing for compliments doesn’t get us anywhere near sincere appreciation, either personally or professionally. The tragedy is that the more we try to impress someone, the less we succeed. The desire to please turns us into people who are not filled with light and warmth inside. We mutate into dark, gray eminences addicted to applause and beautiful flattery. At some point, we prefer a hypocritical compliment a thousand times more than the unvarnished truth.

9. Your weaknesses make you strong.

Studies have shown that admitting our own weaknesses earns us sympathy points from our social environment. No one likes flawlessly perfect people who only remind you of your own weaknesses. But we do ourselves even more good by standing by our flaws. We acknowledge them, like troublesome ghosts that still haunt and find no rest. And, like ghosts, once these find the acceptance they seek, their mission is over. When we no longer sweep them under the rug or lock them in the basement with the other skeletons, we take away their power over us, and that can be decidedly liberating and release unimagined energies within us.

10. Forcing it does not lead to success.

The fastest and most consistent way to sabotage your own success is to try to force it at all costs. Nothing we have to rush into can last. Let loose and let things take their course. What is destined to be yours will not fail you.

Our conclusion

Live backwards, instead. No, unfortunately that's not possible. But it would be immensely practical, that much is certain. Even those of us who spend a lot of time with the wisdom of philosophers and scholars from all cultural backgrounds will never be able to complete our trove of knowledge by purely studying readings. Life sometimes just happens and not all the stops we come to in transit will be pleasantly remembered – "that’s life."